Sunday, February 15, 2009

Word Play

Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational, which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are the winners:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus : A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxicaton : Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation : Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone ( n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte (v.): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Osteopornosis : A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon (n.): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.


  1. I think I will now be incorporating ignoranus into my vocabulary! I LOVE it!

  2. To cute!!! Those were great :-D

    Recent blog post: To you my beautiful girl

  3. Oh - I just love these, especially the first ones! I definitely need to start using them!

    And your husband is a darn hero - giving you 48 hours of blissful time.. on your own. :)

    Recent blog post: Give-away (dog not included)!

  4. Ooh so this is the new comment thingie. I don't know if I like it. It made me type in all this info and if it doesn't save it I'll be mad.

    But I do like the word ignoranus. I shall start using it.
    Damn! I just looked up and saw Sassy said the same thing. What an ignoranus :-P

    Recent blog post: Lessons I learned this weekend

  5. Yes, I agree it needs a bit more tweaking. I don't like how it looks especially. :(

  6. I love all of them! Nicely done!

    Recent blog post: Still Lovey Dovey

  7. These are bloody smashing!! I love them! :-D

    Recent blog post: Echoes

  8. Happy Birthday, Animal!
    These were great. I'm working up something from our big night out. Keep an eye out. :-$

    Recent blog post: Blicky Kitty Karmathon: A Moment of Peace

  9. Wonderfunny!! (made that one up, myself)

    Recent blog post: From the H-Files (The Hippie Files)--My First Love

  10. And here's another list for my fridge. I especially love Osteopornosis - it deserved the extra credit.

  11. Great stuff...I love Karmageddon. Don't we all know it too!?

  12. So funny! I might have to steal this idea for my new feature Fun and Games with Jenners! ;)

    Recent blog post: Fun and Games with Jenners - Game 1: Bad Writing

  13. LOL!

    These are all just too funny!


    Hey! I didn't know about this! I would have sent in like a hundred altered words!



Thoughts appreciated. Advice welcome. Douche-baggery scoffed at then deleted.