Auditioning for Britain's Got Talent

I wish I had news regarding my Britain's Got Talent (BGT) audition on Monday, but I won't find out if I made it through to the second round until February, possibly even March.  The impatient me that demands instant gratification whimpers at the thought, but the other pragmatic me just heaved a giant sigh of relief that I don't have to think about it for the rest of the holidays and well into the new year. 


Because of a certain release form that I signed to participate in the BGT show, I cannot say much about the audition experience. But I will say this: The mechanics of a show like this are fascinating. The sheer numbers of people coming out to audition are incredible and the show handles all of them beautifully. Sure we had to sit around for a couple hours with not much going on, but we were given a pleasant space to do so in, and all the employees that I came in contact with were very nice and helpful. 


I lucked out in the morning and was able to walk right into the holding room at 8:30 am, without ever having to wait in a line outside. As it was below freezing outside, this was HUGE. 


I don't know about you, but if I am by myself and know I'm going to be somewhere awhile and am feeling chatty, I like to scope out a room when entering for an interesting yet completely non-threatening person. I targeted a charming older gentleman from Bournemouth named Roger who made the mistake of making eye contact with me as I swaggered in, reveling in the fact that I had sidestepped having to go outside.  I wish I could tell you more about Roger, but somehow I ended up talking about myself most of the time. I know! So out of character...  I can tell you that he was going to sing "Some Enchanted Evening" and that he cut a fine figure in his velvet dinner jacket.


After a couple hours of hanging out with Roger, going to the loo (I was drinking copious amounts of lemon tea to try and loosen up my vocal chords), and routinely being mistaken for a "group act" with my be-velveted companion, the crowd controllers came in and got us reorganized into our proper groups (Goodbye, Roger! Good luck!) and then turned on Kesha's Tik Tok to get the crowd PUMPED UP!!  I have to say that the crowd was pretty unenthusiastic.  Except for the group acts, who were asked specifically to go do their thing for the cameras in the center area, everyone else stayed in their chairs and were, for lack of a better word, completely lame.  Ever the people-pleaser, I tried clapping for a bit and then settled on standing up and moving a bit closer so I could watch the people who were "performing" for the cameras better.  These acts were composed of dancers, giant beach ball jugglers and little girls in sequins.  The women dancers alarmed  me with their extreme bosom action.  Whoa! Popping and locking it when you've got a real set of gazongas looks dangerous!

After the necessary footage of holding area mayhem was captured, the music wound down and we returned to waiting.  I got called up at 11:15am (almost three hours after arriving) with three other people. All female singers. All under the age of  20. One of them was 12! The world is so different now... I probably would've jumped at the chance to do something like this when I was 12, but the closest I would've gotten to a similar thing would've been ... singing at the county fair, maybe? School talent show? Anyhoo... 


I got called into a room with a producer-type and a camera/sound monitor-type and answered a few questions, sang my song, and then answered a few more questions.  I sang well, didn't miss any notes, had an interesting song choice, looked good (thank you to my weekend house-guests for helping me coordinate my outfit!), and felt pretty confident that I did as well as I possibly could and that the guy listening thought it was, at the very least, interesting enough to not look bored or annoyed at any point. 


I doubt I will be able to say anything else about it until I am either on tv or not, so this will have to be enough.  I'm not banking on getting asked back, but will secretly assume that I will be. ;)  


Honestly, though, I am just grateful to be in this wonderful, wacky host country where it seems like I get the opportunity to do the things that I love way more often than I ever did in the States.  Thank you, England!!!!