So, I thought this was just something that men went through and resolved with either a totally inappropriate new car or with a totally inappropriate new wife. Nobody said that women are destined to come to a point in their lives where they know longer are sure who they are, how they got there, and where they are going! I could've used a little warning here, people. My mom keeps telling me, "You're only 36! You still have a lifetime of working and career opportunities ahead of you. Don't feel like you have to make all the decisions right now." But I DO feel like I need to make some serious decisions. I DO feel like I need to plant my flag on either the "working" or the "stay-at-home" side of the fence. My husband is threatening a family move for his career sometime in the next few years and the thought of moving someplace new and only having the children and their schools as my point of contact for making new friends is, frankly, terrifying. I have started on the road to getting a masters in library science, but am not sure that working even a 1/2 time job is something I am going to want or be able to do.... Three strong-willed boys getting older and wilier every year has me worried that I really will have to devote even more time to raising them and I would hate to feel like I let them down somehow by going back to work when I didn't have to. Arrrrrgh. I am pretty much just spewing my thoughts here b/c I am so preoccupied with them and hoping that some of the other moms I know will have some advice on the topic.
I will continue with this in my next postings.